blog...so heres another xanga entry, first in a long time. first of the year. just another "omg i still cant believe i'm on this shit" entry. yes, i kinda cant believe it...over 4 years on this xanga shit.
      i'm a much different person now than i was back then, as expected...first of all, i think i've discovered the secret to living a happier life...learning to let go; feelings dont last and the way others feel about you wont last either, so you anticipate the change, always being prepared for when it happens. all the while, not letting whats in your heart stop you from allowing others to enjoy your company.
     second thing i realized, i'm gaining weight.

...FUCK.

-trancis

blog...its funny how love can really blind someone into doing or saying things that are irrational and otherwise dont make much sense to other people not a part of it. and then we abuse eachother with hurtful words and physical pain, then realize that such hurt shouldnt have been caused in the first place because the loss on our end is too much to bear.
     i myself am not so sure of what love really is. i believe most people in the world will die without having experienced true love, because few are so fortunate. some of us will live our entire life denying what we really feel inside only to seem sane to the rest of the world. the saddest type of person i believe is one that fakes their happiness.
     i must be a pretty sad soul.

-trancis

blog...there are times when i look back and wonder why i was the way that i was, some remember who i used to be and still hold it against me. some realize what i've become and appreciate my existence even more. some accept me for anything that i was, anything i am, and will still approve of what i become in the future. some people use me and forget about me when i'm no longer of any use to them...yet i'm alright with it. the time we spent as friends will be cherished forever.
     the age old phrase "dont try to be someone/something you're not" has lately got me wondering. should i not try to be someone old enough to purchase alcohol? should i not try to be a dj? should i act upon how i feel deep down inside simply because its who i really am? the dreamers have dreams to chase, and they are the innovators of something great. if not for the man that dreamed of going to space, we'd only know of whats on earth and nothing more. sometimes its okay to wander beyond what we know as the truth for there is much more to who you could be than what you already are.

-trancis

blog...what i dont understand is why some people choose who they want as their friends rather than build friendships and trust from scratch as it should be. if you're one of those people, take a look at your so called friends and see if they hold you dear as much as you hold them. even if the friendship ends, the ones that were mutual are the ones that will be remembered.
     on the other side, friends take care of eachother. they dont expect their friends to take care of themselves, they make sure things dont go wrong. sure we might not always accept the helping hand our dearest friends reach out with, but we need to understand that they do it because they care, and you should do the same for them when they need it. sometimes the friends you have at the top of your myspace friends arent as caring for you as those lower in your top friends, or some not in your top friends at all. such flawed humans.

-trancis